function get_random(maxNum)
{
 var ranNum= Math.floor(Math.random()*(maxNum));
 return ranNum;
}

function getaQuote()
{
  if (document.getElementById && document.createTextNode) 
  {
	  
     var quote=new Array()
quote[0]="Today is the tomorrow I worried about yesterday – and it did not happen.";
quote[1]="Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.";
quote[2]="Lets all be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed.";
quote[3]="One of the things that worry business people is the number of unemployed on their payroll.";
quote[4]="There are only two races on this planet, the intelligent and the stupid.";
quote[5]="Life is a one way street, and you are not coming back.";
quote[6]="A diplomat…is a person who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.";
quote[7]="Your attitude, not your aptitude will determine your altitude.";
quote[8]="Half the money I spend on advertising is wasted, and the trouble is I do not know which half.";
quote[9]="We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.";
quote[10]="If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of mortgage payment.";
quote[11]="I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship.";
quote[12]="Borrow money from pessimists – they do not expect it back.";
quote[13]="Hard work pays off in the future, Laziness pays off now.";
quote[14]="Despair is the price one pays for setting oneself an impossible aim.";
quote[15]="Seen it all, done it all, cannot remember most of it.";
quote[16]="A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.";
quote[17]="Some so- called open minds should be closed for repair.";
quote[18]="Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but not their own facts.";
quote[19]="Fill every thought with determination, every step with courage and every word with love.";
quote[20]="What happens if you get scared half to death twice?";
quote[21]="Life is very insistent; and always seems to be so when friends sadly leave us.";
quote[22]="Every moment is one moment less.";
quote[23]="Whenever you see a successful business, someone once made a courageous decision.";
quote[24]="When easy does it, somebody usually has to do it again.";
quote[25]="If its to be, its up to me.";
quote[26]="Invoices travel through the post at twice the speed of cheques.";
quote[27]="Work expands to fill the time available for its completion.";
quote[28]="A person travels the world over in search of what they need, and then return home to find it.";
quote[29]="The waist is a terrible thing to mind. The mind is a terrible thing to waste.";
quote[30]="Ham and Eggs: A days work for a chicken; A lifetime commitment for a pig.";
quote[31]="I am not the manager because I am always right, but I am always right because I am the manager.";
quote[32]="A critic is a man who knows the way but cannot drive the car.";
quote[33]="You are not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.";
quote[34]="If you don not like something change it. If you cannot change it, change your attitude.";
quote[35]="I do not have a solution, but I do admire the problem.";
quote[36]="Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.";
quote[37]="Optimists stayed up last night to see the New Year in, Pessimists however waited to make sure the old one had left.";
quote[38]="A pub landlord is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.";
quote[39]="Being a failure is not as easy as it looks.";
quote[40]="Peace on earth will come to stay, when we live Christmas every day.";
quote[41]="Patriotism is the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons.";
quote[42]="A kind deed a day, like little drops of rain, make a mighty ocean and a gracious world.";
quote[43]="Minds are like parachutes. They only function when they are open.";
quote[44]="A perfectionist takes infinite pains and often gives them to other people.";
quote[45]="Do not talk unless you can improve the silence.";
quote[46]="Conscience is a little thing that tells you someone is sure to find out.";
quote[47]="Whether you think you can or whether you think you can't, you're right.";
quote[48]="Never look down on anybody unless you're helping him up.";
quote[49]="To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.";
quote[50]="A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a song.";
quote[51]="An eye for eye only ends up making the whole world blind.";
quote[52]="You can have everything in life that you want if you just give enough other people what they want.";
quote[53]="I made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it short.";
quote[54]="Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things.";
quote[55]="Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.";
quote[56]="Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm.";
quote[57]="I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.";
quote[58]="Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it.";
quote[59]="If you keep saying things are going to be bad, you have a chance of being a prophet.";
quote[60]="Losers visualize the penalties of failure. Winners visualize the rewards of success.";
quote[61]="If you want to test your memory, try to recall what you were worrying about one year ago today.";
quote[62]="The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.";
quote[63]="Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.";
quote[64]="Motivation is a fire from within. If someone else tries to light that fire under you, chances are it will burn very briefly.";
quote[65]="Being defeated is only a temporary condition; giving up is what makes it permanent.";
quote[66]="Anyone can do something when they WANT to do it. Really successful people do things when they don't want to do it.";
quote[67]="Attitudes are contagious. Make yours worth catching.";
quote[68]="If you worry about yesterday's failures, then today's successes will be few.";
quote[69]="In matters of style, swim with the current;";
quote[70]="In matters of principle, stand like a rock.";
quote[71]="By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day";
quote[72]="In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on";
quote[73]="Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.";
quote[74]="I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.";
quote[75]="I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.";
quote[76]="Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. YES is the answer.";
quote[77]="Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.";
quote[78]="We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.";
quote[79]="Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.";
quote[80]="The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.";
quote[81]="Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.";
quote[82]="If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.";
quote[83]="We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.";
quote[84]="Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.";
quote[85]="War does not determine who is right - only who is left.";
quote[86]="Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.";
quote[87]="Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.";
quote[88]="The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.";
quote[89]="Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.";
quote[90]="To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.";
quote[91]="If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.";
quote[92]="If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?";
quote[93]="If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.";
quote[94]="Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.";
quote[95]="How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?";
quote[96]="A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..";
quote[97]="A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it.";
quote[98]="Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says IN AN EMERGENCY PLEASE NOTIFY I put DOCTOR. What's my mother going to do?";
quote[99]="I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian";
quote[100]="A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.";
quote[101]="I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.";
quote[102]="The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.";
quote[103]="Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?";
quote[104]="The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.";
quote[105]="Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.";
quote[106]="Crowded elevators smell different to midgets.";
quote[107]="A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.";
quote[108]="Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.";
quote[109]="He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.";
quote[110]="My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.";
quote[111]="Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.";
quote[112]="When in doubt, mumble.";



    
	 var whichQuote=get_random(quote.length);
	 
	var thequote = document.getElementById("my_quote");
    thequote.innerHTML = quote[whichQuote];
  }
} 

getaQuote();